Lost Love, What Could Have Been
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July 24, 2022,
He looked her up online.
It has now been over 15 years since he last saw her.
Quietly, he is still deeply in love with her. She never was with him.
She was the initiator and was very persistent in flirting. They had many lunches together.
Never consummated things.
Once he had a sizable gathering at his five bedroom home. As a co-worker, she was invited. His wife was busy and did not attend.
The two had a private discussion in his backyard, by the pond, about him coaching her daughter in tennis where he previously achieved elite results with another female high school tennis player.
With more experience, he was extremely confident he could do that with her child as well.
Then, she was divorced. Her situation now? Can’t really tell. She is blonde, intelligent, gregarious and gorgeous, so she will always have choices and options.
With a great job too. A brilliant career. A job and organization you never want to leave.
She has clearly moved on. Successfully. That was extremely evident from her profile. Great career pathway with fantastic benefits, wonderful retirement plan and social respectability.
His future, now past, has been hit and miss.
Mostly miss.
He didn’t live the life he had wanted in part because, after college, he didn’t really know what he wanted.
Powerful life lesson there. Try very early to decide what you think you want in life. Think hard about it. Keep thinking about it.
Then pursue it. Do not let that pathway slip away.
Don’t pursue?
You could end up a deeply sad cautionary tale, like our friend.
If you allow life to decide for you what it thinks you should have and who you should be, if your story is like his, you’ll be in deep trouble.
Life can be very cruel, as he found out, spending 20 years in a humiliating but stable job that he hated.
But this re-telling is not about him and his disappointing existence, where life clearly passed him by, and now, ironically, in his 60’s, he is having success, but it feels too little, too late.
He wanted a life with her. He loved and still loves her deeply.
Painfully so.
He wonders, if she would have taken his offer, then with a common goal, the success of her daughter, it would have melded them closer together.
In terms of relationships, he is a simple and honest man.
His wife would have allowed him to have her as a mistress. She’s different like that. As long as he gives her what she wants, which is primarily that beautiful 5 bedroom home in a gated community, be discreet, keep it away from the children and their home, but he had her permission.
He never lied to his wife. Ever. And falling in love with the younger blonde happened by accident. It can be so hard to control your feelings when someone beautiful like that is coming on to you. Finds you attractive, even though you are at least 15 years older than her.
Again, what if she had taken his offer.
Would they still be together?
Why make the offer? Why not just have an affair with her?
He didn’t want to steal from her child.
She wanted him to meet her child. She was actually in love with a bad boy type but knew he wasn’t step father material.
Our friend initially declined.
He didn’t want to be just another male who was temporarily nice to her child because he was in love with her beautiful mommy, bond with her and then when the affair ended; abandon her.
If he was going to have a relationship with her mother, she must greatly benefit too.
Straight A student and a tennis super star will get you paid. Get you a scholarship. It was a lock. He did it once with his own daughter, when he had less experience. With substantially more experience, he could do it with her too.
She declined his offer.
If only her gorgeous mother had taken his offer.
There would have been guard rails and lines that could not be crossed if it were to work.
He had thoroughly thought this through.
They could never make love at her home or his.
Her home was her child’s domain, where she would only see him as an elite tennis coach. He did not want her to suspect that something romantic was happening between the adults. He wanted the child to feel that she was unique and special. He was certain, among her young contemporaries, no one had an elite tennis coach.
Only her.
As a product of divorce, it could greatly bolster her self-esteem.
So, no lovemaking inside of her home.
Nor at his wife’s home.
That was her domain.
Even though she gave him permission to be with this co-worker he had deeply fallen in love with, he would never insult her by having sex with another woman in her house.
Remember her words.
Be discreet.
Five star hotels and luxury getaways in scenic Northern California, by the lakes and in the Redwoods.
Delicious healthy dinners by the fireplace. Lunch with a balcony view.
Is he delusional you ask? They had lunch, but friends have lunch too.
Answer? No. Why?
That day at the party, when he and the young woman left the main living area and talked in the backyard, later, two different attendees, unconnected to one another, thought he and his dear heart went off and privately made love. As one of them would later say, even when people are trying to hide it, you can tell when two people are attracted to one another.
Independent confirmation.
Twice.
Are you disappointed with him?
His pleading is that it is extremely hard to corral your emotions and feelings when you have fallen in love with another and have your wife’s permission to proceed.
He felt, with deep appreciation, he would have become closer to his wife. He absolutely did not want to give her up and during their over 20 year marriage, with two beautiful children, he never lied to her.
Not once.
Have you ever experienced love lost?
The epitome of a film that speaks to a powerful love lost and what could have been is the 1988 classic, simply titled, Summer Story.
A Summer Story is a British drama film released in 1988, directed by Piers Haggard, based on John Galsworthy’s 1916 short story “The Apple Tree“, with a script by Penelope Mortimer. It stars James Wilby, Imogen Stubbs, and Susannah York.
Here is the storyline.
In 1904, a young gentleman visiting a rural area has an intense love affair with a village girl. Eighteen years later, he is passing that way again. Is she with him as well?
You need to watch this one. We won’t give too much away but if you have ever experienced the pain and deep sense of loss, for what could have been, you truly should watch this gem.
When two people love one another as much as these two did, no matter the obstacles, they must get together.
Or else.
Trust us. You don’t want to experience the “or else”.
Our associate described above, knows that all too well. The or else.
What could have been, but wasn’t.
And never will be.
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OPENING PHOTO fciwomenswrestling.com femcompetititor.com grapplingstars.com, fciwomenswrestling.com fciwomenswrestling2.com wrangler-Shutterstock-photo-credit-.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Summer_Story
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